Canadians mad about protests

By: A.J. Blauer, Ottawa Sun, 07/30/03

As a tourist destination, Parliament Hill says a lot about Canadians. Its towering Gothic buildings speak of our British sense of dignified conservatism.

Its pristine lawns and litter-free walkways demonstrate our passion for order and cleanliness. And as for the flames bursting from the fountain out front, well, that's just a reminder that as a people, we're all burning mad!

Mad about war. Mad about peace. Mad about capitalism.

Mad about communism. Mad about Americans. Mad about Canadians.

Mad about those people from that other place on the other side of the ocean who are consequently mad about us. And sometimes, we're just plain stark raving mad.

Of maddening matters, we lack nothing. But when it comes to staging our madness, there is only one prominent location of national significance: Parliament Hill.

And so it was yesterday that four very different protest groups descended on the Hill at the same time to add their cries to the chorus of malcontent that makes up the "O" in O Canada.

In typically Canadian fashion, anyone is allowed to stand on the steps of Parliament and voice their discontent with the government -- as long as they ask the government's permission first. And, in typically Canadian fashion, they usually get it.

The Falun Dafa people got their permit. The anti-gun control people didn't. The pro-marijuana people might have had a permit, but it likely got burned along with all the other documents they were setting on fire.

And as for the guy opposing same-sex marriages, well, he didn't stick around long enough for anyone to ask.

Permits or not, all four groups found themselves competing for the attention of curious tourists and Hill reporters seeking a break from the drawn-out campaign of Liberal egomaniacs vying to be unelected into the job of prime minister.

I first spoke with Mary Zhu of the Falun Dafa movement. That's the meditative group that's trying to spread its principles of truthfulness, compassion and tolerance in the shadow of a government in China that cares for none of those things.

Zhu insisted she was not on the Hill to protest, but rather, educate people about the Falun Dafa movement.

A diminutive woman dressed in a bright yellow shirt and sun hat, Zhu was reaching out to Chinese tourists with sandwich boards, pamphlets, even CD-ROMs.

"Basically, we want to tell people we are peaceful," said Zhu.

But where the Falun Dafa campaign was a picture of serenity, the protest by the Canadian Unregistered Firearms Owners Association was downright cantankerous.

Spokesman Bruce Montague, whose T-shirt identified him as a member of the "Tyranny Response Team," marched on the Hill with a placard showing a gun registration card shattering over a backdrop of flames.

'WANNA PUFF'

"I'm trying to get (gun owners) motivated enough to stand up on their hind legs," said Montague, whose month-long, cross-Canada protest against gun control ended yesterday with the media's undivided attention ...

Then the pro-marijuana people showed up. "Hey A.J.

Wanna puff?

"That would be Rick Reimer, the media's best source for colour commentary on marijuana-related issues. Easily recognizable in his straw hat, sandals and potted marijuana plants, Reimer is no stranger to the Hill.

But the pro-marijuana activist remains disillusioned with the lack of comfort services for protesters.

"There is not a scrap of shade to be had and you've got to walk a mile to get to a bathroom," he groaned between tokes on a joint. "They just make it difficult for people to exercise their constitutional rights."

Reimer made use of what was available -- the Centennial Flame -- to set fire to government documents that grant him a medical exemption to smoke pot.

Long after the media went home, a large gathering of tourists remained, transfixed by the folks smoking joints around a smouldering bucket of "bogus government documents." But just as people were getting into the quaint display of defiance, a Mountie rode up on a horse.

Just like that, everyone scattered. Not for fear of arrest, mind you, but out of fear that they might miss an opportunity to have their picture taken with a Mountie on a real live horse!

And so it was that the Mountie and horse posed for photographs on the lawn of Parliament, leaving Reimer and his fellow protesters to pack up their stuff and head home in relative obscurity.

Before I left, I made a point of talking to a tour bus driver. I was concerned about what his elderly passengers had seen. Did it taint their image of Canadians? Will they no longer think of us as a nation of dignified and conservative people?

"Nah," he said. "They're from New York. This is nothing to them."